“And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4).

A popular book on raising children says, “Everyone, grownup or child, gets in a jam occasionally when the only tactful way out is a small lie, and this is no cause for alarm.” This poison from the serpent needs to be challenged.

For one thing, evaluating lies as either big or small is not the important question. All lies are sin, and thus dangerous. The statement says that there is “no cause for alarm.” This is false. Jesus said that “every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment” (Matthew 12:36). If Jesus, the maker of our children, is concerned about idle words, how much more about lying of any kind? “Speak ye every man the truth to his neighbor; execute the judgment of truth and peace in your gates: And let none of you imagine evil in your hearts against his neighbour; and love no false oath: for all these are things that I hate, saith the LORD” (Zechariah 8:16,17).

Secondly, the statement that lying may be the only tactful way out implicitly denies the Biblical teaching: “There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it” (I Corinthians 10:13). The Lord never puts His people in impossible situations where only evil options are available. He always gives a way out. That way may include death, but the Lord gives counsel even here (cf. Matthew 10:28).

Raising children “in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” carries many joys, but this does not mean it is easy. Teaching them to be honest is just one of the many challenging tasks. PGH